Second Year – Synonymous with Stress?
So second year has started…aha
Don’t get me wrong, I love university. I’m so incredibly happy here, but it’s precisely the amount of stuff I do on a daily basis that’s interrupting with my strong desire to lie around doing nothing. I’m not feeling stressed (yet), but the sudden change from doing nothing over the summer to doing something every day has got to me a little bit. There hasn’t been a day where I’ve had the full day indoors. My time is taken up with seminars, lectures, meetings, dance class, training for auditions and socialising. Aside from those uni experiences I also have to feed myself, therefore since going grocery shopping requires leaving the house, I’ve been doing that too, although it’s a little bit easier for me this year since I walk by Tesco each time I go to and from campus (last year I lived in Heronbank so if I wanted to go shopping I’d have to set an hour aside to do so).
Second year is notably different to first year. Workloads increase and assessments become more serious. For me, my grades now start to contribute to my final degree result, which it didn’t last year, which is obviously important for future job searches and also if I want to apply to study abroad next year. I am also now on a society executive committee, to which I must dedicate a significant amount of time. Also to be factored in are the extended travel times involved with living off campus.
Point is, being an adult means you will be busy. If not with work/study, the act of sustaining yourself requires great effort.
Cooking dinner: takes ages.
Walking to campus because I can’t drive: long.
Cleaning the bathroom: (I actually haven’t done this yet so I don’t know how long it takes oops).
Doing laundry: requires you to be at home for a few hours and then fighting with your housemates over who gets to use the machine first.
I’m always thinking about this stuff in the back of my mind, and when something else is on my mind, studying becomes difficult for me. Clearly this is something I need to learn to overcome. Adulthood is full of responsibilities and I need to be able to juggle them. I even completely forgot about a meeting the other day, which is something I’ve never done before and I feel horrible about it. Now I’m making sure to look at my diary every day.
What I find most difficult is motivating myself. Getting out of bed as soon as my alarm goes off, walking to the library in the cold weather. These sorts of things always stand in the way of me being super productive. On the other hand, I have no trouble making the journey to campus for something I’m really enthusiastic about, for example a social.
And then I end up feeling upset because I’m concerned that I’m neglecting spending time with my other friends, or on the other hobbies I enjoy, like writing my book or sewing. So much advice is thrown about, telling you to seize the moment and get involved, but I think I’ve reached the limit of what I can realistically involve myself in. The issue is that I don’t want to miss out on things, and accepting that is hard.
Looming over all this is the need to make myself employable, and that’s a whole other rabbit hole aha…
Regardless, if you’ve read this and can relate, I’d like you to know that you’re not the only one who feels this way. Congratulations, firstly, for being a busy human being; it means you’re getting involved and making the most of your university experience. Or if you’re feeling busy or overwhelmed because of other things, it’ll be okay. Ride that wave and emerge on the other side a better person.