Haven’t I Made It Obvious?
Making friends can seem daunting when starting uni., but others wonder more about sustaining friendships. Whatever the issue, take a breath; it’ll work out. I hope that the following tips will help ease your troubles and make you feel better as you prepare to make true friends for life.
Put Yourself Out There
The best way to make friends is to put yourself out there. That means join various clubs, attend different events and try your best to be sociable and outgoing. I know this can sound scary and many people would rather give it a miss, but it is important to practice chatting to people from all different walks of life until you find someone you may click with. Or not. But you won’t know unless you give it a shot.
If you’re lucky enough to find somebody who you get on well with, it’s important to put a bit of effort in. Meet up with them, spend time with them and let your newfound friendship flourish. It may fizzle out or you may find that they weren’t quite like you imagined, but equally they could turn out to be someone you’ll become firm friends with. I know it’s difficult to find time for everything when balancing studying and society meets etc., but make sure you keep in contact and clear out time for them regularly enough.
This is an unfortunate part of life, but people fall out with friends all the time. Sometimes you just drift apart, other times you argue and are left with a sour taste in your mouth. When this happens, remember you are not alone in being alone. It’s horrible when you fight with your friends to the point where you’re no longer mates, but when this happens, it’s important to assess what happened, how you can learn from it and to stay optimistic. Maybe get in touch with old school chums, join another society or try sitting with different people in your lectures. Chin up, it’s them who’s missing out J
As previously mentioned, I suggest when you’re feeling low, put yourself out there. It’s tough if you’re entirely by yourself, but I’d advise getting stuck in. So they weren’t your cup of tea, that’s the way it goes. Onwards and upwards, form new friendships with better people. If you spot someone sitting by themselves, maybe approach them to see if they’d like some company. After all, they might be in exactly the same position as you and are just longing for someone to join them.
Don’t Give Up!
If you’re feeling down, now is the time to keep pushing. You may believe everyone has formed their cliques already, but that doesn’t mean you can’t join. With any luck, you’ll come across a real gem or two and you’ll have them in your life for many, many years to come.
Topics to Talk About (if you’re really stuck)!
· Your course, exams and future plans
· Your background e.g. where you’re from etc.
· Hobbies and interests
· That fit person over there
· A riveting film/book
· Previous experiences/nights out
· The struggles of being a student (omg, I’m so broke)
· The previous holiday (summer, Christmas)
Remember to avoid politics and religion. This guy once spent about half an hour chatting to me about his political stance and goodness me, I wanted to escape.